Star Whores: Diverse Agenda

[Liar Revealed]

This whole TLJ fiasco has really been bringing me down. I feel like that South Park episode where everyone witnessed Indiana Jones get raped. But it's like NOT seeing the movie is making me imagine it in my mind over and over and obsessing over it. I'm probably gonna have to "watch" it "somehow" and get it over with.

[Rushy]

Okay, since this is the "hate TLJ" club, there was one scene for me where I just facepalmed, and that was near the end of the movie, where Rey meets Poe.

"Hi, third member of our supposed recreation of the Han-Luke-Leia team. Nice to meet you more than halfway through this trilogy."
"Um, hi."

[Rushy]

Also, ain't nobody gonna call Mark Hamill a liar. Mark Hamill is humbler than root beer.

[Liar Revealed]

Okay, since this is the "hate TLJ" club, there was one scene for me where I just facepalmed, and that was near the end of the movie, where Rey meets Poe.

"Hi, third member of our supposed recreation of the Han-Luke-Leia team. Nice to meet you more than halfway through this trilogy."
"Um, hi."

Star Wars geeks have said that you can see the two characters together in a crowd scene on the rebel base planet in ep 7.

[Rushy]

Okay, since this is the "hate TLJ" club, there was one scene for me where I just facepalmed, and that was near the end of the movie, where Rey meets Poe.

"Hi, third member of our supposed recreation of the Han-Luke-Leia team. Nice to meet you more than halfway through this trilogy."
"Um, hi."

Star Wars geeks have said that you can see the two characters together in a crowd scene on the rebel base planet in ep 7.

So?

[Liar Revealed]

Okay, since this is the "hate TLJ" club, there was one scene for me where I just facepalmed, and that was near the end of the movie, where Rey meets Poe.

"Hi, third member of our supposed recreation of the Han-Luke-Leia team. Nice to meet you more than halfway through this trilogy."
"Um, hi."

Star Wars geeks have said that you can see the two characters together in a crowd scene on the rebel base planet in ep 7.

So?

Apparently they already knew each other in JJ's movie, but Rian wrote his movie before JJ's was finished and caused a mistake. Cannot confirm though.

[Rushy]

Star Wars geeks have said that you can see the two characters together in a crowd scene on the rebel base planet in ep 7.

So?

Apparently they already knew each other in JJ's movie, but Rian wrote his movie before JJ's was finished and caused a mistake. Cannot confirm though.

Them being in the background together hardly means they know each other.
But then again... anyone remember the Knights Of Ren?

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

Okay I've been holding this off for way to long. Just got back from the movie, so stream of consciousness go!

• Most memorable trailers included Black Panther (which made me long for a Batman Beyond movie) and whatever the next Jurassic Park movie is called again (really? Another one?)
• One of the audience member was a hobo or something. Sadly didn't provide any keks.
• Poe's "Yo Momma" scene felt like some outtake they forgot to actually take out.
• You know Resistance, maybe you wouldn't lose so many bombers if they weren't frigate-sized target practices that have to slowly shamble directly above their targets. Y- and B-Wings worked a lot better IMO.
• Glad to see that even Space Asians are into the Ying and Yang symbolism.
• That female Resistance member with the mini-buns they kept focusing on for some reason kept reminding me of Marzgurl.
• I like how Luke didn't give a shit.
• I did not like how the entire movie revolved around the slowest and most boring chase scene in sci-fi history.
• Nice to see that both the Force Tree and this evil Sith wall mirror where completely useless.
• Yoda was equally useless, and the Force ghost effect on him felt a bit half-arsed.
• Speaking of useless: the entire casino thing.
• Rey's and Kylo's Force VRChat session felt a bit weird. It's like they had to force (geddit?!) interaction between the two.
• Glad to see that this was already the Special Edition with superfluous CGI critters chewing the scenery.
• Speaking of CGI critters: Most of them where fucking creepy.
• Admiral Ackbar died for our sins.
• Leia is the last daughter of Krypton. Apparently.
• Why was Vice-Admiral Dangerhair dressed like she just visited the opera? Wear a goddamn uniform, dammit.
• Snoke kept reminding me of Mr. Burns.
• I assume they made Snoke's guards a bunch of special snowflakes with stupid weapons and different helmets to sell more action figures.
• I kinda feel like Kylo's offer made a lot more sense than continuing to hang out with like two dozen idiots.
• At this point, Phasma is basically a lame recurring JRPG boss you don't really give a shit about.
• The weird battering ram reminded me of the Planet Killer from Star Trek TOS and the main weapon of those UFOs from Independence Day.
• Sadly Finn didn't go out with a bang like with the Planet Killer and UFO because Rose is an idiot.
• That hyperdrive kamikaze attack was like a fucking wave motion gun. You'd think someone would've weaponized that ages ago if you can wreck that much shit with it.
• Luke's last stand felt a bit weird.
• Good to see that our main characters interact so little with each other that I couldn't for the life of me tell whether or not Poe and Rey have actually met before.
• I essentially walked out of the cinema with the same expression as Snoke's corpse.
• But at least they got a pointless Empires Strikes Back reference, amirite?!

Bottom line: The movie was too long, and it would've probably been better to replace at least half of it with something that makes more sense.

[rabidtictac]

That black panther movie looks fucking amazing. It's going to be meme kangz central when it drops.

[Liar Revealed]

I'm @ 39 min into my torrent and I've finally realized who Hanoi Rose reminds me of. That midget from Fantasy Island.