Spoony the Pussy One: Life is in the Render Queue

[Guest]

The Daily Hog with the latest events:

You stupid whore, there is nothing special or meaningful or prophetic about your associations, you watch Wrestle Wrestle when you take a shit and you have a Twitter alert active when you go shopping begging at the food bank. It's like saying
Oh, I was listening to the weather forecast when I read your tweet about [Drumpf/Wrasslin'/Depression/Capeshit]. Now all I can think about is you whenever I look outside :3

Comedy of errors, indeed. First, fatsos knees buckle under her while in the shower (what is she, 85?), then after staying the day in her piss-soaked sheets, she thinks of going to sleep early because she is tired? What?

hoooly shit, I swear you can't come up with this shit. If the hog had a thread of her own, the title would be:

Saint Warthog: eternally tired and exhausted

[Guest]

"I was looking at the powerbutton of my tv and was reminded I needed to continue my @thespoonyone's live wire marathon"

"Barbershop was on tv and then I got reminded that @thespoonyone is way too cool to get a haircut."

"I only had 5 dollars left so I ordered taco bell and watched some counter monkeys by @thespoonyone, especially the ones where he talked about a taco business. He is such an inspiration."

"I took a big shit and one kind of looked like @thespoonyone so I just hád to start watching Lets Riff on Ripper again."

[Guest]

Yknow I'm glad she tagged @TheSpoonyOne because I wouldn't know she was talking about @TheSpoonyOne if she didnt say @TheSpoonyOne ten times. In fact I hope she keeps tagging @TheSpoonyOne so I know she is talking about @TheSpoonyOne because if I dont see the tag for @TheSpoonyOne I will be confused and maybe think she isnt talking about @TheSpoonyOne. I wonder if she is a fan of @TheSpoonyOne or maybe she just keeps accidentally tagging @TheSpoonyOne. Its a common mistake, @TheSpoonyOne is a pretty common name on twitter.

[Guest]

Warthog now claiming Spoons made the pandemic "better" for all his fans

Bitch the only way HE wouldn't made the pandemic better is that there somehow was a "I got the coof and I'm in the hospital but these doctors just don't *get* me."-Saga.

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

Warthog now claiming Spoons made the pandemic "better" for all his fans

"I might be effectively locked up in my mom's basement (not that this was any different before the lockdown), but at least I'm not @TheSpoonyOne!"

[Guest]

Oh look Spoony's back on twitter for more booty pats. I wonder what he was doing for that whole week of nothing? That level of social media restraint is so rare for him I am genuinely curious.

Waking up early to send out resumés and deliver groceries via his new gig economy job?

The worst part of this is that he thinks before he turned into gollum he was some kind of amazing content producer. He made obvious jokes, surface level observations with slathered on snarkiness, yelled his own stupid catch phrases, and made abysmally shitty skits. That was the extent of his ideas. If he actually had as many and as great ideas as he thought he had back then then why could he not even begin to write a script for his terrible movie?

How can I hire this man to sell insurance for me?

[Guestfag]

I call bullshit.
With such lardass, there is no chance tailbone would be broken,. More like she would fall into fucking basement, making a huge hole in bathroom and maybe even damaging foundation of the building. Even adamantium couldn't stand it, let alone what those leafs have.

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

Don't think too hard about it. She falls on her tailbone at least once per week.

[Guestfag]

I know, that's how earthquakes are made.

[Kugelfisch]

Oh sure, a shower to help relax. Not out of any essential need for hygiene or something, especially as somebody that is incontinent.

How much need for relaxation does a fat, unemployed, inactive pill popper need anyway? I swear she'd feel stressed out over the activity in an opium den.