Video Game Movies and TV Shows

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

Why the fuck is this live-action, anyways? How are we ever gonna get a Smash Bros movie if we can't even get a consistent format?

The fact that they're going to cast a troon as princess Zelda is genuinely upsetting to me. We laugh, but that laughter is hiding real pain.

If it's any consolation the movie will suck anyways.

Though I wonder if there will be a sex scene between "her" and Link...

[TheManWithNoPlan]

The fact that they're going to cast a troon as princess Zelda is genuinely upsetting to me. We laugh, but that laughter is hiding real pain.

The Zelda and MGS movies have been “happening” for decades now no point caring until there is proof the movie is actually happening.

If it does happening though that he/she as Zelda and Elliot Page as Link do it Nintendo you fucking cowards!

[CuckTurdginson]

I wouldn't want to be the person writing the script for this.

The first problem, most obviously is that it is not animated. All this shit is going to look weird now that it is not animated. The next is what do you do with Link. Mario I think you're able to swing having him talk since that's kind of a jokey story to begin with; so if he and Luigi have silly voices, I think it's potable; with Link it is going to sound like the 80's cartoon. I actually don't think the 80's cartoon is terrible, watchable enough for what it is; but my point is no one liked it when Link talked, it got meme'd to no end last time.

The next is Ganondorf. I think there's maybe a game or two that dive into Ganondorf's lore, but not many in mainline Zelda; and certainly not in the NES era. Do you make him some Prophet Muhammad figure for the Gerudo and a secret tyrant? Someone on Twitter is gonna complain about THAT. Or do you give him "kill whitey" motivations to make him seem sympathetic? That seems the most likely, but how do you spin that without making the Hylians completely irredeemable?

Or how about the dungeons? The atmosphere of the dungeons are the highpoints of many a Zelda game, but you don't have enough time in two and a half hours to devote that level of time to let's say four locations; since those are the dungeons in Breath of the Wild - and that'll probably be what they follow. I suppose you can simplify it to like one puzzle, and do a sort of Indiana Jones thing (here's where Link goes inside a fishes stomach! Here's the forest temple!) but even with that streamlining its a lot of ground to cover without some cheap as shit montage.

This isn't even getting into the fact that the screenwriter's credits include "Jurassic World: Dominion" and "Rise of Skywalker," i.e. the two worst fucking blockbusters I've seen in like ten years. You could bring back Grace Kelly from the dead and cast her as Zelda tomorrow, and I don't think it would save this cooked turkey.

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

I actually don't think the 80's cartoon is terrible, watchable enough for what it is; but my point is no one liked it when Link talked, it got meme'd to no end last time.

They can always cast a deaf person.

This isn't even getting into the fact that the screenwriter's credits include "Jurassic World: Dominion" and "Rise of Skywalker," i.e. the two worst fucking blockbusters I've seen in like ten years. You could bring back Grace Kelly from the dead and cast her as Zelda tomorrow, and I don't think it would save this cooked turkey.

At least he has experience with plots revolving around collecting MacGuffins

[Old Black Man]

It’s stunning and brave casting man, that’s all people care about.

[ebin namefag]

Somehow Ganon has returned.

[Kugelfisch]

The fact that they're going to cast a troon as princess Zelda is genuinely upsetting to me. We laugh, but that laughter is hiding real pain.

I couldn't give less of a shit and neither should you. A real life action Zelda movie is about as relevant as a bag of rice falling over in China.
Remember the live action DBZ movie? Of course you don't. Nobody does. It could be just an April Fools joke, like Young Sheldon.

[Rapeculture]

The fact that they're going to cast a troon as princess Zelda is genuinely upsetting to me. We laugh, but that laughter is hiding real pain.

I couldn't give less of a shit and neither should you. A real life action Zelda movie is about as relevant as a bag of rice falling over in China.
Remember the live action DBZ movie? Of course you don't. Nobody does. It could be just an April Fools joke, like Young Sheldon.

Yeah man, you're right as always.

[Kugelfisch]

Yeah man, you're right as always.

You already knew that yourself. How many Resident Evil movies are there right now? Did it ever matter?

[Rapeculture]

Yeah man, you're right as always.

You already knew that yourself. How many Resident Evil movies are there right now? Did it ever matter?

Seven. All uniformally awful. :/