(Or: Zombie Rights)
Our dear reader has already given us plenty of quality girl-on-girl interactions - but this time we're back to a modern setting, so we can hope for some excellent and authentic high school girl hijinks!
And always remember: The Great Linkara refuses to accept Buddhism.
RecapShow
Everyone's still waiting for an actual main plot to happen, so we have to enjoy a bunch of morons spouting dumb shit at each other.
Linkara has a reunion with his school buddies. Oh, and Indow is also there, but she might as well not because she doesn't really interact with anyone. For some reason this book seems to really love shoving extraneous characters into scenes where they are nothing but passive observers.
You probably can't become a BFF of Linkara's without being an insufferable nerdlinger in need of an atomic wedgie like himself, and they certainly do not disappoint in that regard. And just to make them extra quirky, each and every one of them has some super talent and/or hobby that doesn't make sense for a 14-year-old:
- Alice aka Code Poet: 1337 hacker who allegedly makes the CIA her bitch. Is very autistic about the color of her clothes.
- Ted aka Shades: The school's undisputed chief philosopher. Is either a radical objectivist, or at least pretends to be one for some reason.
He also like to hand out bubble gum at "inopportune" times - like after you've just seen your brother get run over by an SUV. - Trevor: First introduced in the very first chapter of this series. Here it turns out he has autistic speed reading powers at near peak human capacity, which comes with the horrible flaw of his brain freezing whenever he comes across a typo.
He also apparently likes reading Jane Austen novels for fun, which somehow manages to make even less sense. - Mandy: The school's knitting goddess. She pretends to be "nice" and "sweet", but IMO is more of a Karen and Proto-SJW who gets triggered when those darn redskins are calling themselves "Indians".
Personally I find it incredibly weird when characters in your story suddenly start spitefully shitting on a different bit of fiction, but then again this is Linkara we're talking about, and it's not like he hasn't done it before (see his numerous rants against Shinji Ikari).
Back in the Williamson Manor, the other members of the fellowship are busy educating themselves about Earth. They catch footage of a nuke blowing up (I'm just gonna assume a clip from the Operation Crossroads tests), and the reaction of our heroes is all over the place:
- Raven throws up.
- Gyaru Casca gets scared shitless and starts having an argument with Linkara's dad. The guy promptly proves he has the Linkaran genes by lecturing her about how wrong and dumb she is for being scared of nukes.
- Lithmenar's just laughing his ass off - though I'm not sure if he's laughing at the nukes or Gyaru Casca.
The obligatory Varek segment has turned into a diary/blog format for some fucking reason.
Oh wait, I think I know the reason: He describes how he's started to squat in the warehouse by kicking out the previous squatters - who had guns. I suspect Linkara (the author) didn't know how to actually write this fight scene without Varek gaining a few extra holes in his head, so he just won off-screen.
(10bux we will never actually see any guns used against him, or anyone for that matter.)
Other than that, he seems to be mostly wasting his time reading newspapers and shit. Apparently he is also in possession of the Darkness' Ultimate Book of Ultimate Evil. Myrrha probably had to give it to him as the price for him fucking off. Allegedly the book unveils ever deeper secrets each and every time one reads it, like it has some form of sentience. Or maybe Varek's just going insane. Who knows.
At least he can now cast Invisiblity, which is a plus because it means he doesn't have to put on casual outfits to not attract attention. His hair is also back to its natural color for some reason, which is blue in his case. I guess he was originally from Aigol? At least it's not blonde.
And just when I thought this shit was over, he threatens the possibility of the dumb prophecy shit from the first two books making a stunning return.
Also for some reason he is sure that the Linkaran will grow bored of the Linkara, and will start begging him to restore the old status quo. I assume Linkara (the author) just wanted him to spout more generic evil dialogue.
ChapterShow
Following the initial introduction of Indow to the group, she, Alice, and Mandy went off ahead of the group to the mall. Indow, ever curious about Earth, wanted to know how merchants operated in the world Louis came from. Louis, in the meantime, went along with Ted and Trevor on their own to the mall where they’d meet up with them later.
“It’s exactly that kind of attitude that keeps them down and enforces outdated stereotypes!” Trevor stated firmly.
“Perhaps, but the stereotype is an accurate one! And I speak from experience on this one.” Louis responded.
“But that doesn’t mean that they’re all like that! Why are you being so prejudiced against them?!” Ted queried.
“Guys, I’m just trying to say why an ethics paper on the oppression faced by zombies isn’t going to work.” Louis replied.
“Louis, I’m telling you it’s gold! Look at the way zombies are portrayed in movies – they’re slow, dim-witted flesh-eaters who do nothing but cause a menace to society. It’s a xenophobic and deadist point of view.” Ted continued.
“Deadist?” Louis asked.
“You know, like racist or sexist but against the dead.” Ted explained.
“Well, it’s not exactly a prejudiced view when it’s a hundred percent accurate.” Louis replied.
“It is not a hundred percent accurate!” Trevor spoke.
Louis stood up from the bench he had been sitting at. While the three had initially thought that they were going to shopping, their conversations had consumed their attentions and [sic] weren’t going to make them budge an inch until the matter had been resolved. Louis had brought up the fact that, while on Sin, he had encountered zombies and fought them. Ted had mentioned that his English class was preparing to do original papers for discussions on ethics and he was planning on working on a paper with Trevor about the oppression of zombies.
“Oh, yeah? Name three occurrences where zombies aren’t a menace to society.” Louis challenged.
“Shaun of the Dead’s ending. We see zombies as happy, productive members of society who contribute to the world by being entertaining for people to watch. Shaun even has a zombie he can play video games with!”
“Doesn’t count because it was a comedy. Only official horror movie zombies count.” Louis balked.
“Ha! It might have been sold to the public as a comedy, but don’t you tell me that the scenes in the pub didn’t get you the least bit horrified, with the guy being pulled through the window and-”
“Yes, thank you, Ted, but I’d appreciate not being reminded of horror movie scenes that made me kind of queasy and disturbed.” Louis said, making a sick look on his face.
“HA! There, you see? You called it a horror movie!” Trevor said proudly in victory.
Louis rolled his eyes. “Okay, that’s one exception. You’re going to need at least two other-”
Ted interrupted, “Marvel Zombies. Intelligent zombies who managed to take over the world.”
“Oh, come on! That miniseries didn’t make the least bit of sense! And it was just really gross. We’re expected to believe that not only do most of the heroes survive even after various parts of their bodies have been ripped apart, but also that for some reason the plague only seemed to affect superheroes and supervillains. And for crying out loud, how exactly do you make Luke freaking Cage a zombie?! He’s got invulnerable skin; you can’t bite into him!”
“Mind you, we’re having a discussion on something that doesn’t exist-” Trevor began to say.
“Again, I’ve fought real zombies.”
“Maybe so, but you have to look beyond the plot holes and admit that these were take-charge zombies who were intelligent and calculating.” Trevor finished.
“Okay, but what about your third example?” Louis inquired.
“Land of the Dead.” Ted replied.
“What about it? I’ve never seen it.” Louis said.
“Well, actually Ted and I never saw it, either, but we hear that there’s some leader zombie who’s intelligent.”
“We’re going to rent it later and find out if it’s true.”
Louis sighed and put his head in his hands.
*
“So this mall is essentially just an indoor marketplace?” Indow asked, looking around her at the various shops and stores.
“I suppose you could say that. So you do have capitalism back on Sin?” Alice queried.
“Well, I’m afraid that while I’ve studied various subjects and fields in my normal teachings and learning, I never really got around to economics. We could very well have it, but I wouldn’t know for certain because I don’t know what it is.”
Alice and Mandy took their time teaching Indow various economic models as they moved from shop to shop, focusing mostly on getting Indow some new clothes to wear. From capitalism to communism to monopolies, they gave Indow a crash course in business and money based on whatever knowledge they retained from the economics classes they had during their first two trimesters. Interspersed throughout their discussions, they had to somehow convince Indow to try on new clothing. Indow was confused about what exactly was wrong with her robes.
At one store, when they finally forced her into a dressing room, she refused to come out after putting on the clothes.
“I’m sure you look fine, Indow.” Alice stated.
“I’ve got nothing covering my stomach or my arms! I’ll freeze to death in this outfit! And where’s my tail supposed to go?!” she called from behind her changing room.
“Indow, it’s like seventy degrees outside!” Mandy stated.
“I don’t care! I might as well be naked in this outfit!” Indow yelled back.
“Well, then you’re coming out of there naked, Indow. We have your robes and we’re not giving them back to you until you show us what you look like.” Alice demanded.
“You know, a thought occurs, why hasn’t anyone around us commented on the fact that Indow has fur and pointed ears?” Mandy inquired.
“Did you notice she had fur when you first saw her?” Alice asked, smirking.
“No, I thought she just had kind of darker skin until I saw her up close.”
Alice leaned back against a wall in the changing room hallway. “And if you saw a person that looked like they had fur or pointed ears in a mall, like in a food court, what would you do?”
Mandy blinked and didn’t respond, trying to think about what her reaction would be.
“You’d do nothing, exactly. Weirder things and people show up in places. They probably think she’s doing some weird cosplay or dare or something. People have been staring a bit, but that’s all.” Alice explained.
“I suppose that makes sense...” Mandy said, trailing off.
The door to the changing room opened and Indow stepped out, her cheeks red thanks to her blushing. She had her arms crossed over her midriff-exposed stomach, almost like she was trying to hide it. She was wearing a bright pink tube top over her chest and a tight pair of dark blue jeans on her legs, her tail tucked down one pant leg. She kept the simple shoes she had worn since the start of her journey, however, over the objections of the girls. Her hair was let down and rested on her shoulders.
“I wore an outfit like this once when I was working at a Warrior’s Rest...” she complained.
“Well, get used to seeing it around here, sister. Women dress like this all the time.” Mandy said with a smile.
“Only girls who can’t figure out what to wear on a regular basis.” Alice stated as she smirked, posing a little in her beatnik-like outfit.
“Can I have my robes back? People will stare at me if I try to go out in this.” Indow spoke, still blushing.
“Hun, you want people to look at you. Especially the guys.” Mandy explained as she crossed her arms.
Indow blinked at her and tilted her head slightly in confusion.
“Why?”
Mandy stared back at her. “What do you mean?”
“Why would you want men to look at you?” Indow queried.
It was Mandy’s turn to be confused. “I don’t know... I suppose because then you can feel appreciated and beautiful because all of those people looking at you in envy and admiration.”
Indow’s brow furrowed slightly as she tried to make sense of what Mandy was saying. “But you’re already appreciated and beautiful. Why do you need the validation of others on it? Their opinions on your beauty are as irrelevant as their opinions on what color the sky should be. It does not change the true facts of the situation. I’m not some statue to be ogled at.”
“Right on, woman!” Alice said with a laugh, distracting the two from their train of thought.
Indow looked to Alice and smiled. “All right, I will wear this ridiculous outfit, but only if I can wear some other long-sleeved shirt over it. I want to at least cover my arms.”
“Deal. Change back into your robes and we’ll go pay for the clothes.” Alice said, handing the robes back over to Indow.
The Priestess went back inside the fitting room to get back into her normal clothes. Alice looked to Mandy, who shrugged her shoulders and leaned back against the wall beside Alice.
“I don’t see anything wrong with liking to be looked at.” Mandy said.
“Neither do I and I suspect Indow doesn’t, either, she just doesn’t come from a place where the mass media creates an irregular standard that people, especially women, are supposed to live up to.” Alice explained.
Mandy rolled her eyes. “Please, you don’t buy into the idea that people are that influenced by the media. We’ve talked about this. People only are influenced by it if they let themselves be influenced by it. People have free will and can make their own choices.”
Alice smirked. “Yeah, but does Indow get that?”
*
“In other news, questions still remain unanswered by the Pharos City police chief Eddie Crane on the actual relationship the police now share with the costumed vigilante ‘Lightbringer.’ The questions came about after Chief Crane announced his public support and commitment to working with the ‘superhero’ in cleaning up the crime rate of the city. While public opinion of the world’s first ‘real’ superhero has been high, many lawmakers and law enforcement personnel are taking offense to Chief Crane’s support of what they call a ‘violent, lawbreaking vigilante.’ The Pharos City police commissioner has so far refused to comment on-”
The image on the TV paused thanks to the TiVo installed into it. Lithmenar looked over at White Raven, confused as to why she had paused the news program. White Raven looked intently at the screen, a confused look on her face.
“I’m watching this, you know.” He pointed out.
“I’m aware of that; I’m just trying to figure out what a ‘superhero’ is.” She replied.
“Human beings with abilities beyond those of ordinary people who put on costumes to hide their identity and engage criminals in combat.” said Louis’ brother as he entered the room, eating some jello from a small container.
“Louis never mentioned this to us.” White Raven stated.
“He wouldn’t, really. Thing is, that Lightbringer guy’s only been around for a few weeks now and he’s the only one out there.” George replied.
“Then where did the term ‘superhero’ come from if it’s that recent?” Lithmenar asked.
“Comic books. Did Louis tell you about those?”
The two nodded.
“Well, then there you have it. Superheroes have been around in comic books for over sixty years. While I really only read Nightwing, Louis is pretty much a walking encyclopedia for everything else going on. Lightbringer’s been taking out criminals in Pharos City and doing a damned good job of it.” George explained.
“So he’s like some warrior who stays in one place and eliminates thugs? How droll.” Lithmenar says, leaning back on the couch.
“He doesn’t kill them. He hasn’t killed a single person yet. Sure, intense burns and broken limbs, but no one’s died. Hell, no one even got killed during the raid on the Slavers’ HQ.”
“Slavers? I thought Louis said slavery was an illegal and immoral practice on your world.” White Raven said.
George nodded and swallowed some of his jello. “Damn right it is. It still happens, though. Pharos has had so much crime in it that the Slavers were abducting people, raping and killing, and all the other fun, happy stuff in broad daylight because they knew no one would do anything about it. Suddenly Lightbringer starts showing his face and in two weeks, he takes out the entire organization just by throwing their leader through a window.”
Jordahn walked into the living room, having overheard the conversation from the other room. “But he hasn’t killed anyone? Louis would’ve just eliminated them like any warrior should.”
George turned to face her. “What are you talking about?”
“Enemies like that should not be allowed to survive. If it had been Louis in that spot, he would’ve annihilated his foes with honor.” Jordahn responded.
“What the hell are you saying?! Louis doesn’t kill people!” George almost yelled.
“Of course he does. He did when he was back on Sin. He killed Dark Knights and Terafell Arbiters in battle all the time,” Jordahn said, pausing for a moment to cringe and add, “And sometimes when he wasn’t.”
“Louis killed people?!” George exclaimed in shock.
“Of course he did. It was wartime and he was a soldier. Why do you look so surprised?” Jordahn inquired, confused by George’s reaction.
*
Louis’ jaw almost dropped as he saw Indow approach with Mandy and Alice following. The change of outfit suited her well as she wore the clothes that his two friends had bought for her, with the addition of a plaid button-down shirt similar to Louis’ own usual attire. The conversation about zombies had long since ended and he, along with Ted and Trevor, had gone to the food court to wait for the girls to return. After getting some Arby’s, they were just about to return to conversing about things that only geeks would consider fascinating until the girls showed up.
“Indow, you look... uh... um...” Louis tried to speak, his words getting muffled as he continued to stare at Indow.
“I look like a whore.” She responded, crossing her arms and glaring at Mandy.
Mandy rolled her eyes and sat down at the table where the three boys were. “You’re so afraid of people looking at you, but wearing those robes everywhere will get you to stick out like a sore thumb.”
“At least they’re dignified.” Indow replied as she sat down at the table.
“I can tell you right away, Indow, that you are the most beautiful woman in the world in whatever clothes you where [sic].” Louis commented as he leaned over to give Indow a kiss on the cheek.
Indow gladly accepted it and blushed. “Thank you, my love.”
Ted grinned and leaned forward, pushing his sunglasses down to the edge of his nose. “Ah, ‘She walks in beauty, like the night of cloudless climes and starry skies; and all that’s best of dark and bright meet her aspect and her eyes: thus mellow’d to that tender light which heaven to gaudy day denies.’ Gum?”
Ted offered a piece of gum to the two young lovers. They declined his offer.
“Well, what else are we going to be doing for the rest of the day?” Alice asked.
“I was thinking that after we finished lunch, Indow and I would go back home. Tomorrow, we might head out to the Mega Mall and show her Camp Snoopy as her introduction to amusement parks.” Louis replied.
“Can I get you anything to drink, my love? Perhaps some of that brown liquid you were drinking yesterday?” Indow queried.
“No pop for me, Indow. My body’s still getting readjusted to being back here, so it’s just water from now until-”
Louis almost yelled in shock as he looked down at his water. The others turned to look at him and their gazes followed down with his. Louis’ eyes widened and the blood drained from his face, making it appear pale and sick as he stared down at the water glass in front of him. The others got just as surprised by the sight before them, albeit it was only Indow and Louis who truly understood what was happening. A black cloud was moving through the water, as if a spot of black paint had been dropped into the clear liquid. As the water completely turned black, blackened steam rose from the glass as Louis looked up from the glass across the food court to its nearby entrance of but ten feet away. Varek the Destroyer was standing in the doorway, his face twisted into a glare.
“Hello, Linkara. I’ve come to kill you.”
“It’s exactly that kind of attitude that keeps them down and enforces outdated stereotypes!” Trevor stated firmly.
“Perhaps, but the stereotype is an accurate one! And I speak from experience on this one.” Louis responded.
“But that doesn’t mean that they’re all like that! Why are you being so prejudiced against them?!” Ted queried.
“Guys, I’m just trying to say why an ethics paper on the oppression faced by zombies isn’t going to work.” Louis replied.
“Louis, I’m telling you it’s gold! Look at the way zombies are portrayed in movies – they’re slow, dim-witted flesh-eaters who do nothing but cause a menace to society. It’s a xenophobic and deadist point of view.” Ted continued.
“Deadist?” Louis asked.
“You know, like racist or sexist but against the dead.” Ted explained.
“Well, it’s not exactly a prejudiced view when it’s a hundred percent accurate.” Louis replied.
“It is not a hundred percent accurate!” Trevor spoke.
Louis stood up from the bench he had been sitting at. While the three had initially thought that they were going to shopping, their conversations had consumed their attentions and [sic] weren’t going to make them budge an inch until the matter had been resolved. Louis had brought up the fact that, while on Sin, he had encountered zombies and fought them. Ted had mentioned that his English class was preparing to do original papers for discussions on ethics and he was planning on working on a paper with Trevor about the oppression of zombies.
“Oh, yeah? Name three occurrences where zombies aren’t a menace to society.” Louis challenged.
“Shaun of the Dead’s ending. We see zombies as happy, productive members of society who contribute to the world by being entertaining for people to watch. Shaun even has a zombie he can play video games with!”
“Doesn’t count because it was a comedy. Only official horror movie zombies count.” Louis balked.
“Ha! It might have been sold to the public as a comedy, but don’t you tell me that the scenes in the pub didn’t get you the least bit horrified, with the guy being pulled through the window and-”
“Yes, thank you, Ted, but I’d appreciate not being reminded of horror movie scenes that made me kind of queasy and disturbed.” Louis said, making a sick look on his face.
“HA! There, you see? You called it a horror movie!” Trevor said proudly in victory.
Louis rolled his eyes. “Okay, that’s one exception. You’re going to need at least two other-”
Ted interrupted, “Marvel Zombies. Intelligent zombies who managed to take over the world.”
“Oh, come on! That miniseries didn’t make the least bit of sense! And it was just really gross. We’re expected to believe that not only do most of the heroes survive even after various parts of their bodies have been ripped apart, but also that for some reason the plague only seemed to affect superheroes and supervillains. And for crying out loud, how exactly do you make Luke freaking Cage a zombie?! He’s got invulnerable skin; you can’t bite into him!”
“Mind you, we’re having a discussion on something that doesn’t exist-” Trevor began to say.
“Again, I’ve fought real zombies.”
“Maybe so, but you have to look beyond the plot holes and admit that these were take-charge zombies who were intelligent and calculating.” Trevor finished.
“Okay, but what about your third example?” Louis inquired.
“Land of the Dead.” Ted replied.
“What about it? I’ve never seen it.” Louis said.
“Well, actually Ted and I never saw it, either, but we hear that there’s some leader zombie who’s intelligent.”
“We’re going to rent it later and find out if it’s true.”
Louis sighed and put his head in his hands.
*
“So this mall is essentially just an indoor marketplace?” Indow asked, looking around her at the various shops and stores.
“I suppose you could say that. So you do have capitalism back on Sin?” Alice queried.
“Well, I’m afraid that while I’ve studied various subjects and fields in my normal teachings and learning, I never really got around to economics. We could very well have it, but I wouldn’t know for certain because I don’t know what it is.”
Alice and Mandy took their time teaching Indow various economic models as they moved from shop to shop, focusing mostly on getting Indow some new clothes to wear. From capitalism to communism to monopolies, they gave Indow a crash course in business and money based on whatever knowledge they retained from the economics classes they had during their first two trimesters. Interspersed throughout their discussions, they had to somehow convince Indow to try on new clothing. Indow was confused about what exactly was wrong with her robes.
At one store, when they finally forced her into a dressing room, she refused to come out after putting on the clothes.
“I’m sure you look fine, Indow.” Alice stated.
“I’ve got nothing covering my stomach or my arms! I’ll freeze to death in this outfit! And where’s my tail supposed to go?!” she called from behind her changing room.
“Indow, it’s like seventy degrees outside!” Mandy stated.
“I don’t care! I might as well be naked in this outfit!” Indow yelled back.
“Well, then you’re coming out of there naked, Indow. We have your robes and we’re not giving them back to you until you show us what you look like.” Alice demanded.
“You know, a thought occurs, why hasn’t anyone around us commented on the fact that Indow has fur and pointed ears?” Mandy inquired.
“Did you notice she had fur when you first saw her?” Alice asked, smirking.
“No, I thought she just had kind of darker skin until I saw her up close.”
Alice leaned back against a wall in the changing room hallway. “And if you saw a person that looked like they had fur or pointed ears in a mall, like in a food court, what would you do?”
Mandy blinked and didn’t respond, trying to think about what her reaction would be.
“You’d do nothing, exactly. Weirder things and people show up in places. They probably think she’s doing some weird cosplay or dare or something. People have been staring a bit, but that’s all.” Alice explained.
“I suppose that makes sense...” Mandy said, trailing off.
The door to the changing room opened and Indow stepped out, her cheeks red thanks to her blushing. She had her arms crossed over her midriff-exposed stomach, almost like she was trying to hide it. She was wearing a bright pink tube top over her chest and a tight pair of dark blue jeans on her legs, her tail tucked down one pant leg. She kept the simple shoes she had worn since the start of her journey, however, over the objections of the girls. Her hair was let down and rested on her shoulders.
“I wore an outfit like this once when I was working at a Warrior’s Rest...” she complained.
“Well, get used to seeing it around here, sister. Women dress like this all the time.” Mandy said with a smile.
“Only girls who can’t figure out what to wear on a regular basis.” Alice stated as she smirked, posing a little in her beatnik-like outfit.
“Can I have my robes back? People will stare at me if I try to go out in this.” Indow spoke, still blushing.
“Hun, you want people to look at you. Especially the guys.” Mandy explained as she crossed her arms.
Indow blinked at her and tilted her head slightly in confusion.
“Why?”
Mandy stared back at her. “What do you mean?”
“Why would you want men to look at you?” Indow queried.
It was Mandy’s turn to be confused. “I don’t know... I suppose because then you can feel appreciated and beautiful because all of those people looking at you in envy and admiration.”
Indow’s brow furrowed slightly as she tried to make sense of what Mandy was saying. “But you’re already appreciated and beautiful. Why do you need the validation of others on it? Their opinions on your beauty are as irrelevant as their opinions on what color the sky should be. It does not change the true facts of the situation. I’m not some statue to be ogled at.”
“Right on, woman!” Alice said with a laugh, distracting the two from their train of thought.
Indow looked to Alice and smiled. “All right, I will wear this ridiculous outfit, but only if I can wear some other long-sleeved shirt over it. I want to at least cover my arms.”
“Deal. Change back into your robes and we’ll go pay for the clothes.” Alice said, handing the robes back over to Indow.
The Priestess went back inside the fitting room to get back into her normal clothes. Alice looked to Mandy, who shrugged her shoulders and leaned back against the wall beside Alice.
“I don’t see anything wrong with liking to be looked at.” Mandy said.
“Neither do I and I suspect Indow doesn’t, either, she just doesn’t come from a place where the mass media creates an irregular standard that people, especially women, are supposed to live up to.” Alice explained.
Mandy rolled her eyes. “Please, you don’t buy into the idea that people are that influenced by the media. We’ve talked about this. People only are influenced by it if they let themselves be influenced by it. People have free will and can make their own choices.”
Alice smirked. “Yeah, but does Indow get that?”
*
“In other news, questions still remain unanswered by the Pharos City police chief Eddie Crane on the actual relationship the police now share with the costumed vigilante ‘Lightbringer.’ The questions came about after Chief Crane announced his public support and commitment to working with the ‘superhero’ in cleaning up the crime rate of the city. While public opinion of the world’s first ‘real’ superhero has been high, many lawmakers and law enforcement personnel are taking offense to Chief Crane’s support of what they call a ‘violent, lawbreaking vigilante.’ The Pharos City police commissioner has so far refused to comment on-”
The image on the TV paused thanks to the TiVo installed into it. Lithmenar looked over at White Raven, confused as to why she had paused the news program. White Raven looked intently at the screen, a confused look on her face.
“I’m watching this, you know.” He pointed out.
“I’m aware of that; I’m just trying to figure out what a ‘superhero’ is.” She replied.
“Human beings with abilities beyond those of ordinary people who put on costumes to hide their identity and engage criminals in combat.” said Louis’ brother as he entered the room, eating some jello from a small container.
“Louis never mentioned this to us.” White Raven stated.
“He wouldn’t, really. Thing is, that Lightbringer guy’s only been around for a few weeks now and he’s the only one out there.” George replied.
“Then where did the term ‘superhero’ come from if it’s that recent?” Lithmenar asked.
“Comic books. Did Louis tell you about those?”
The two nodded.
“Well, then there you have it. Superheroes have been around in comic books for over sixty years. While I really only read Nightwing, Louis is pretty much a walking encyclopedia for everything else going on. Lightbringer’s been taking out criminals in Pharos City and doing a damned good job of it.” George explained.
“So he’s like some warrior who stays in one place and eliminates thugs? How droll.” Lithmenar says, leaning back on the couch.
“He doesn’t kill them. He hasn’t killed a single person yet. Sure, intense burns and broken limbs, but no one’s died. Hell, no one even got killed during the raid on the Slavers’ HQ.”
“Slavers? I thought Louis said slavery was an illegal and immoral practice on your world.” White Raven said.
George nodded and swallowed some of his jello. “Damn right it is. It still happens, though. Pharos has had so much crime in it that the Slavers were abducting people, raping and killing, and all the other fun, happy stuff in broad daylight because they knew no one would do anything about it. Suddenly Lightbringer starts showing his face and in two weeks, he takes out the entire organization just by throwing their leader through a window.”
Jordahn walked into the living room, having overheard the conversation from the other room. “But he hasn’t killed anyone? Louis would’ve just eliminated them like any warrior should.”
George turned to face her. “What are you talking about?”
“Enemies like that should not be allowed to survive. If it had been Louis in that spot, he would’ve annihilated his foes with honor.” Jordahn responded.
“What the hell are you saying?! Louis doesn’t kill people!” George almost yelled.
“Of course he does. He did when he was back on Sin. He killed Dark Knights and Terafell Arbiters in battle all the time,” Jordahn said, pausing for a moment to cringe and add, “And sometimes when he wasn’t.”
“Louis killed people?!” George exclaimed in shock.
“Of course he did. It was wartime and he was a soldier. Why do you look so surprised?” Jordahn inquired, confused by George’s reaction.
*
Louis’ jaw almost dropped as he saw Indow approach with Mandy and Alice following. The change of outfit suited her well as she wore the clothes that his two friends had bought for her, with the addition of a plaid button-down shirt similar to Louis’ own usual attire. The conversation about zombies had long since ended and he, along with Ted and Trevor, had gone to the food court to wait for the girls to return. After getting some Arby’s, they were just about to return to conversing about things that only geeks would consider fascinating until the girls showed up.
“Indow, you look... uh... um...” Louis tried to speak, his words getting muffled as he continued to stare at Indow.
“I look like a whore.” She responded, crossing her arms and glaring at Mandy.
Mandy rolled her eyes and sat down at the table where the three boys were. “You’re so afraid of people looking at you, but wearing those robes everywhere will get you to stick out like a sore thumb.”
“At least they’re dignified.” Indow replied as she sat down at the table.
“I can tell you right away, Indow, that you are the most beautiful woman in the world in whatever clothes you where [sic].” Louis commented as he leaned over to give Indow a kiss on the cheek.
Indow gladly accepted it and blushed. “Thank you, my love.”
Ted grinned and leaned forward, pushing his sunglasses down to the edge of his nose. “Ah, ‘She walks in beauty, like the night of cloudless climes and starry skies; and all that’s best of dark and bright meet her aspect and her eyes: thus mellow’d to that tender light which heaven to gaudy day denies.’ Gum?”
Ted offered a piece of gum to the two young lovers. They declined his offer.
“Well, what else are we going to be doing for the rest of the day?” Alice asked.
“I was thinking that after we finished lunch, Indow and I would go back home. Tomorrow, we might head out to the Mega Mall and show her Camp Snoopy as her introduction to amusement parks.” Louis replied.
“Can I get you anything to drink, my love? Perhaps some of that brown liquid you were drinking yesterday?” Indow queried.
“No pop for me, Indow. My body’s still getting readjusted to being back here, so it’s just water from now until-”
Louis almost yelled in shock as he looked down at his water. The others turned to look at him and their gazes followed down with his. Louis’ eyes widened and the blood drained from his face, making it appear pale and sick as he stared down at the water glass in front of him. The others got just as surprised by the sight before them, albeit it was only Indow and Louis who truly understood what was happening. A black cloud was moving through the water, as if a spot of black paint had been dropped into the clear liquid. As the water completely turned black, blackened steam rose from the glass as Louis looked up from the glass across the food court to its nearby entrance of but ten feet away. Varek the Destroyer was standing in the doorway, his face twisted into a glare.
“Hello, Linkara. I’ve come to kill you.”
RiffingShow
Which we didn't get to see, btw. Though who honestly wants to see some teenagers meet some hoe from another world for the first timeFollowing the initial introduction of Indow to the group...
?And does this imply the introduction happened after the whacky hijinks at the park? When she had already sat there awkwardly on the sidelines for I assume at least an hour, ignored by (almost) all? Wouldn't it have made more sense for her to join later?
Oh, so that's why she had to already be at the park. Because they had to immediately go to the mall, which is the actual location where Indow is important.... she, Alice, and Mandy went off ahead of the group to the mall.
Except Linkara (the author) has already shown to just skip shit like her introduction, so I dunno why he couldn't just cut her out of the previous chapter and then start this one with "After picking up Indow...".
They accept the local currency in exchange for goods and services, just like in your world.Indow, ever curious about Earth, wanted to know how merchants operated in the world Louis came from.
I'm sure leaving Indow alone with are effectively two strangers to her won't backfire at all.Louis, in the meantime, went along with Ted and Trevor on their own to the mall where they’d meet up with them later.
“It’s exactly that kind of attitude that keeps them down and enforces outdated stereotypes!” Trevor stated firmly.
This is off to a great start.
I dunno if this'll be better or worse once we actually know WTF they're talking about.“Perhaps, but the stereotype is an accurate one! And I speak from experience on this one.” Louis responded.
“But that doesn’t mean that they’re all like that! Why are you being so prejudiced against them?!” Ted queried.
“Guys, I’m just trying to say why an ethics paper on the oppression faced by zombies isn’t going to work.” Louis replied.
Worse it is.
“Louis, I’m telling you it’s gold! Look at the way zombies are portrayed in movies – they’re slow, dim-witted flesh-eaters who do nothing but cause a menace to society. It’s a xenophobic and deadist point of view.” Ted continued.
“Deadist?” Louis asked.
“You know, like racist or sexist but against the dead.” Ted explained.
They're arguing about whether or not Linkara's real experience with the undead is sufficiently representative of the concept of fictional zombies. This is the type of "intellectual" and "philosophical" discussions we're dealing with.“Well, it’s not exactly a prejudiced view when it’s a hundred percent accurate.” Louis replied.
“It is not a hundred percent accurate!” Trevor spoke.
The Great Linkara shall not allow his minions to indulge in consumerist behavior until they have accepted the wrongness of their opinion.Louis stood up from the bench he had been sitting at. While the three had initially thought that they were going to shopping, their conversations had consumed their attentions and [sic] weren’t going to make them budge an inch until the matter had been resolved.
You know, you'd think that Hillside's famous philosopher king would be able to realize that the zombies are the oppressors here. They intrude upon everyone else's life, and they try to force everyone to conform to their way of living (erasing their individuality in the process).Louis had brought up the fact that, while on Sin, he had encountered zombies and fought them. Ted had mentioned that his English class was preparing to do original papers for discussions on ethics and he was planning on working on a paper with Trevor about the oppression of zombies.
But no, they're bad guy portrayed in a negative light, so they're oppressed I guess.
Are you guys now trying to figure out which of the various fictional zombies are in favor and against your theory? Get a fucking life, you losers.“Oh, yeah? Name three occurrences where zombies aren’t a menace to society.” Louis challenged.
They have to be put in chains because they're still trying to eat people, which you might just see as a form of slavery, Mr. Philosopher.“Shaun of the Dead’s ending. We see zombies as happy, productive members of society who contribute to the world by being entertaining for people to watch. Shaun even has a zombie he can play video games with!”
This discussion has all the sophistication of a playground pretend-fight.“Doesn’t count because it was a comedy. Only official horror movie zombies count.” Louis balked.
Give me a moment. I'm too sober for this.“Ha! It might have been sold to the public as a comedy, but don’t you tell me that the scenes in the pub didn’t get you the least bit horrified, with the guy being pulled through the window and-”
“Yes, thank you, Ted, but I’d appreciate not being reminded of horror movie scenes that made me kind of queasy and disturbed.” Louis said, making a sick look on his face.
“HA! There, you see? You called it a horror movie!” Trevor said proudly in victory.
Much better.
Apparently taking over the world (by killing everyone) does not count as being a "menace to society".Louis rolled his eyes. “Okay, that’s one exception. You’re going to need at least two other-”
Ted interrupted, “Marvel Zombies. Intelligent zombies who managed to take over the world.”
Thor, Hulk and I think Galactucs also got zombified - and you draw the line at some glorified strongman?“Oh, come on! That miniseries didn’t make the least bit of sense! And it was just really gross. We’re expected to believe that not only do most of the heroes survive even after various parts of their bodies have been ripped apart, but also that for some reason the plague only seemed to affect superheroes and supervillains. And for crying out loud, how exactly do you make Luke freaking Cage a zombie?! He’s got invulnerable skin; you can’t bite into him!”
“Mind you, we’re having a discussion on something that doesn’t exist-” Trevor began to say.
And are still a menace to society.“Again, I’ve fought real zombies.”
“Maybe so, but you have to look beyond the plot holes and admit that these were take-charge zombies who were intelligent and calculating.” Trevor finished.
“Okay, but what about your third example?” Louis inquired.
“Land of the Dead.” Ted replied.
“What about it? I’ve never seen it.” Louis said.
“Well, actually Ted and I never saw it, either, but we hear that there’s some leader zombie who’s intelligent.”
“We’re going to rent it later and find out if it’s true.”
Hey, that's my thing.Louis sighed and put his head in his hands.
*
Did Linkara never tell you guys about malls? I thought Burgers loved those things.“So this mall is essentially just an indoor marketplace?” Indow asked, looking around her at the various shops and stores.
This better not turn into another inane discussion.“I suppose you could say that. So you do have capitalism back on Sin?” Alice queried.
That's a lot of words just to say "Bitch, I dunno what you're talking about."“Well, I’m afraid that while I’ve studied various subjects and fields in my normal teachings and learning, I never really got around to economics. We could very well have it, but I wouldn’t know for certain because I don’t know what it is.”
Thank God, we only get the CliffNotes version.Alice and Mandy took their time teaching Indow various economic models as they moved from shop to shop, focusing mostly on getting Indow some new clothes to wear. From capitalism to communism to monopolies, they gave Indow a crash course in business and money based on whatever knowledge they retained from the economics classes they had during their first two trimesters.
I assume these cerebrally stimulating discourses are only of interest to Linkara (the author) if his self-insert is present to deliver unto us the objective truth.
If she took a look around she would notice that she's the only one dressed like this. But I guess this is another one of those cases where name- and faceless civilians don't really exist.Interspersed throughout their discussions, they had to somehow convince Indow to try on new clothing. Indow was confused about what exactly was wrong with her robes.
And did she or Linkara do anything to cover her ears, tail and that thin layer of fur she supposedly has? That would raise some eyebrows if there's not an anime convention going on at the same time.
Did you not look at the clothes before trying them on. And where does your tail usually go?At one store, when they finally forced her into a dressing room, she refused to come out after putting on the clothes.
“I’m sure you look fine, Indow.” Alice stated.
“I’ve got nothing covering my stomach or my arms! I’ll freeze to death in this outfit! And where’s my tail supposed to go?!” she called from behind her changing room.
But did she complain about the heat before?“Indow, it’s like seventy degrees outside!” Mandy stated.
Peer pressure and/or bullying? What a delightful collection of friends Linkara's got there.“Indow, it’s like seventy degrees outside!” Mandy stated.
“I don’t care! I might as well be naked in this outfit!” Indow yelled back.
“Well, then you’re coming out of there naked, Indow. We have your robes and we’re not giving them back to you until you show us what you look like.” Alice demanded.
“You know, a thought occurs, why hasn’t anyone around us commented on the fact that Indow has fur and pointed ears?” Mandy inquired.
I see our dear author has recognized this issue and is about to put our worries at ease.
“Did you notice she had fur when you first saw her?” Alice asked, smirking.
“No, I thought she just had kind of darker skin until I saw her up close.”
Alice leaned back against a wall in the changing room hallway. “And if you saw a person that looked like they had fur or pointed ears in a mall, like in a food court, what would you do?”
Mandy blinked and didn’t respond, trying to think about what her reaction would be.
“You’d do nothing, exactly. Weirder things and people show up in places. They probably think she’s doing some weird cosplay or dare or something. People have been staring a bit, but that’s all.” Alice explained.
“I suppose that makes sense...” Mandy said, trailing off.
Oh, Mandy. Being worried about those NPCs. They aren't even real.
Those jeans can't be that tight if you can tuck a fucking tail in there, can they?The door to the changing room opened and Indow stepped out, her cheeks red thanks to her blushing. She had her arms crossed over her midriff-exposed stomach, almost like she was trying to hide it. She was wearing a bright pink tube top over her chest and a tight pair of dark blue jeans on her legs, her tail tucked down one pant leg.
You have weird priorities.She kept the simple shoes she had worn since the start of her journey, however, over the objections of the girls.
But not for long, Honey.“I wore an outfit like this once when I was working at a Warrior’s Rest...” she complained.
"You'd have noticed it if we had background extra in this series."“Well, get used to seeing it around here, sister. Women dress like this all the time.” Mandy said with a smile.
I'm sure everyone is really impressed by your unique and fascinating style that hasn't been en vogue ever.“Only girls who can’t figure out what to wear on a regular basis.” Alice stated as she smirked, posing a little in her beatnik-like outfit.
"Especially the older guys."“Can I have my robes back? People will stare at me if I try to go out in this.” Indow spoke, still blushing.
“Hun, you want people to look at you. Especially the guys.” Mandy explained as she crossed her arms.
Really? You were the town bicycle of at least two entire kingdoms. Can you seriously not pick up what this hoe is putting down?Indow blinked at her and tilted her head slightly in confusion.
“Why?”
I get the feeling that Linkara (the author)'s view on women here did not age well.Mandy stared back at her. “What do you mean?”
“Why would you want men to look at you?” Indow queried.
It was Mandy’s turn to be confused. “I don’t know... I suppose because then you can feel appreciated and beautiful because all of those people looking at you in envy and admiration.”
Can we go back to sperging about capitalism. Pretty please?Indow’s brow furrowed slightly as she tried to make sense of what Mandy was saying. “But you’re already appreciated and beautiful. Why do you need the validation of others on it? Their opinions on your beauty are as irrelevant as their opinions on what color the sky should be. It does not change the true facts of the situation. I’m not some statue to be ogled at.”
So what, she's getting a sweater over her top? But what about the scorching Minnesotan spring sun?Indow looked to Alice and smiled. “All right, I will wear this ridiculous outfit, but only if I can wear some other long-sleeved shirt over it. I want to at least cover my arms.”
“Deal. Change back into your robes and we’ll go pay for the clothes.” Alice said, handing the robes back over to Indow.
The Priestess went back inside the fitting room to get back into her normal clothes.
Seems to me you haven't had the wrong kind of male attention yet.Alice looked to Mandy, who shrugged her shoulders and leaned back against the wall beside Alice.
“I don’t see anything wrong with liking to be looked at.” Mandy said.
So you're like okay with being slutty, but you also are aware that the mass media wants you to be slutty?“Neither do I and I suspect Indow doesn’t, either, she just doesn’t come from a place where the mass media creates an irregular standard that people, especially women, are supposed to live up to.” Alice explained.
Mandy rolled her eyes. “Please, you don’t buy into the idea that people are that influenced by the media. We’ve talked about this. People only are influenced by it if they let themselves be influenced by it. People have free will and can make their own choices.”
Nope. She will do what ever her sweetheart and messiah demands.Alice smirked. “Yeah, but does Indow get that?”
*
Warning. Linkara's IPs are crossing over for real. This is not a drill.“In other news, questions still remain unanswered by the Pharos City police chief Eddie Crane on the actual relationship the police now share with the costumed vigilante ‘Lightbringer.’ The questions came about after Chief Crane announced his public support and commitment to working with the ‘superhero’ in cleaning up the crime rate of the city. While public opinion of the world’s first ‘real’ superhero has been high, many lawmakers and law enforcement personnel are taking offense to Chief Crane’s support of what they call a ‘violent, lawbreaking vigilante.’ The Pharos City police commissioner has so far refused to comment on-”
(And the Chief has already declared his undying support for the Lightbringer. What more information does the press want, and why is he avoiding them? And no, I'm not gonna read the comic to see if this shit makes more sense there.)
Linkara (the author) sure is getting his mileage out of this TV having a pause function.The image on the TV paused thanks to the TiVo installed into it.
And you had to pause the TV for that?Lithmenar looked over at White Raven, confused as to why she had paused the news program. White Raven looked intently at the screen, a confused look on her face.
“I’m watching this, you know.” He pointed out.
“I’m aware of that; I’m just trying to figure out what a ‘superhero’ is.” She replied.
Holy fucking shit. George is actively interacting with the real characters.“Human beings with abilities beyond those of ordinary people who put on costumes to hide their identity and engage criminals in combat.” said Louis’ brother as he entered the room, eating some jello from a small container.
“Louis never mentioned this to us.” White Raven stated.
(And why did Linkara never compare himself a capeshitter in their presence?)
Yeah, but capeshitters have been around for decades in comics.“He wouldn’t, really. Thing is, that Lightbringer guy’s only been around for a few weeks now and he’s the only one out there.” George replied.
See?“Then where did the term ‘superhero’ come from if it’s that recent?” Lithmenar asked.
“Comic books."
Then why are you so sure that he wouldn't mention capeshitter in their presence?"Did Louis tell you about those?”
The two nodded.
“Well, then there you have it. Superheroes have been around in comic books for over sixty years. While I really only read Nightwing, Louis is pretty much a walking encyclopedia for everything else going on.
Then again, things can't really get worse for Pharos City anymore..."Lightbringer’s been taking out criminals in Pharos City and doing a damned good job of it.” George explained.
It's like he's actually doing shit, instead of just stealing money.“So he’s like some warrior who stays in one place and eliminates thugs? How droll.” Lithmenar says, leaning back on the couch.
"Oh sure, some are scarred and crippled for life, but at least they're still alive, right?"“He doesn’t kill them. He hasn’t killed a single person yet. Sure, intense burns and broken limbs, but no one’s died. Hell, no one even got killed during the raid on the Slavers’ HQ.”
It's almost like these two stories weren't originally intended to be part of the same cinematic universe.“Slavers? I thought Louis said slavery was an illegal and immoral practice on your world.” White Raven said.
You know you're reading an authentic Lovhaug when rape is casually brought up.George nodded and swallowed some of his jello. “Damn right it is. It still happens, though. Pharos has had so much crime in it that the Slavers were abducting people, raping and killing, and all the other fun, happy stuff in broad daylight because they knew no one would do anything about it.
I assume this was on the first floor? Or did he like catch him before he got splattered on the ground?"Suddenly Lightbringer starts showing his face and in two weeks, he takes out the entire organization just by throwing their leader through a window.”
Book 1-2 Linkara? Most definitely. Book 3+ Linkara? Not so much.Jordahn walked into the living room, having overheard the conversation from the other room. “But he hasn’t killed anyone? Louis would’ve just eliminated them like any warrior should.”
Fuck, if Book 3 is any indication he'd just kick the Chief Slaver in the nuts and then just piss off without dismantling his organization.
Kicking people in the balls isn't exactly honorable.George turned to face her. “What are you talking about?”
“Enemies like that should not be allowed to survive. If it had been Louis in that spot, he would’ve annihilated his foes with honor.” Jordahn responded.
This is like the first natural reaction in this entire book, and it only took us getting past 1/4 of the story.“What the hell are you saying?! Louis doesn’t kill people!” George almost yelled.
“Of course he does. He did when he was back on Sin. He killed Dark Knights and Terafell Arbiters in battle all the time,” Jordahn said, pausing for a moment to cringe and add, “And sometimes when he wasn’t.”
“Louis killed people?!” George exclaimed in shock.
“Of course he did. It was wartime and he was a soldier. Why do you look so surprised?” Jordahn inquired, confused by George’s reaction.
*
Louis’ jaw almost dropped as he saw Indow approach with Mandy and Alice following.
"Fuck yeah! My sweetheart is dressed just like me!"The change of outfit suited her well as she wore the clothes that his two friends had bought for her, with the addition of a plaid button-down shirt similar to Louis’ own usual attire.
I'm glad this conversation got such a satisfying conclusion.The conversation about zombies had long since ended and he, along with Ted and Trevor, had gone to the food court to wait for the girls to return.
I am a geek, and I couldn't give less of a shit about the inane bullshit you guys are talking about.After getting some Arby’s, they were just about to return to conversing about things that only geeks would consider fascinating until the girls showed up.
Well, you are one.“Indow, you look... uh... um...” Louis tried to speak, his words getting muffled as he continued to stare at Indow.
“I look like a whore.” She responded, crossing her arms and glaring at Mandy.
And how exactly did they force you to put that outfit back on after they bought it for you and you were back in your robes? You're a fucking wizard. Just tell them to go fuck themselves.
Didn't you just talk with the Great Code Poet about how being a total freak isn't a big deal?Mandy rolled her eyes and sat down at the table where the three boys were. “You’re so afraid of people looking at you, but wearing those robes everywhere will get you to stick out like a sore thumb.”
“At least they’re dignified.” Indow replied as she sat down at the table.
“I can tell you right away, Indow, that you are the most beautiful woman in the world in whatever clothes you where [sic].” Louis commented as he leaned over to give Indow a kiss on the cheek.
Indow gladly accepted it and blushed. “Thank you, my love.”
(You know things are dire when I can use fucking RWBY to make fun of this.)
Quick! use a flashlight!Ted grinned and leaned forward, pushing his sunglasses down to the edge of his nose.
He did it again!“Ah, ‘She walks in beauty, like the night of cloudless climes and starry skies; and all that’s best of dark and bright meet her aspect and her eyes: thus mellow’d to that tender light which heaven to gaudy day denies.’ Gum?”
And I guess we can add Lord Fucking Byron to the list of shit this 14-year-old is into for some reason.
Ted offered a piece of gum to the two young lovers. They declined his offer.
Sounds like a real riot.“Well, what else are we going to be doing for the rest of the day?” Alice asked.
“I was thinking that after we finished lunch, Indow and I would go back home. Tomorrow, we might head out to the Mega Mall and show her Camp Snoopy as her introduction to amusement parks.” Louis replied.
Can't see that going wrong, so by all means send her on this quest.“Can I get you anything to drink, my love? Perhaps some of that brown liquid you were drinking yesterday?” Indow queried.
“No pop for me, Indow. My body’s still getting readjusted to being back here, so it’s just water from now until-”
Louis almost yelled in shock as he looked down at his water. The others turned to look at him and their gazes followed down with his. Louis’ eyes widened and the blood drained from his face, making it appear pale and sick as he stared down at the water glass in front of him. The others got just as surprised by the sight before them, albeit it was only Indow and Louis who truly understood what was happening. A black cloud was moving through the water, as if a spot of black paint had been dropped into the clear liquid. As the water completely turned black, blackened steam rose from the glass as Louis looked up from the glass across the food court to its nearby entrance of but ten feet away. Varek the Destroyer was standing in the doorway, his face twisted into a glare.
Now you might be wondering how the fuck Varek managed to find and recognize Linkara, and I'm sure we will get an amazing explanation next chapter.
I'm mostly confused by the water. I thought water no longer did that after the Darkness got killed? Plus the guy is turning "normal" again to the point that his hair color changed. So how come the water's still turning black in his presence?
"I am T'kata Varek. You killed my blob. Prepare to die."“Hello, Linkara. I’ve come to kill you.”